(Script until prologue part 2) Fire Emblem: Eagles & Lions (updated 24-3-2021)

Projects Concepts
42

Yeah but Rhea is the Archbishop and it’ll be a big deal.

43

Think on it as she has played an spell on him and uses the marriage to take control of faerghus army

44

I understand your idea, but what about the rest of the world? As I said it would kinda of a big deal and it at least should be mentioned that he is the husband of the Archbishop in the opening/

45

Yeah, I should develop the idea more

46

Hello

Here I am for Part 2 of the Prologue.

  • Pan: What the heck?
    Magnus (Cousin of Kryphon, General and strategist of Fraldarius): Boy, there is no time for that, hurry up, we must get into the fort. -> Where did Magnus come from? He wasn’t at the end of the previous part. His presence seems a little sudden;

  • “Pan, what are you doing ?! Do you want us to be killed ?!” -> Why would Kryphon say that? Is Pan not attempting to reason with Lambert?;

  • Loog: We have to defend ourselves. We cannot tolerate being attacked by our own rulers! -> What does Loog mean with this last sentence?;

  • “What the hell is that ?!” -> I think “What the hell are those?” would be more correct;

  • Loog: “No way … those creatures not seen since the Nemesis war …” -> I believe that since the creatures are right there with them it should be “these creatures”. Also, I think the sentence would sound better in English if you said “these creatures hadn’t been seen since the…”;

  • Kryphon: “No, we must resist, it is only a matter of time before your energy runs out and stops being able to summon the beasts …” -> Is Kryphon addressing Lambert here? Because this line being in between two others line of dialogue doesn’t really make it fit;

      • The playable battle begins * -> Having the battle already start after Frederick’s line seems a little bit sudden. Do you think adding a line or two would make it transition more naturally?;

  • “Although perhaps the Church allows us to use the blessed weapons …” -> “Although perhaps the Curch will allow us to…”;

  • Pan: “In the meantime, we should find a way to face the demonic beasts … and I have a couple of ideas.” -> What are these ideas? Are they gameplay-related?;

  • "It seems I have to resort to my last trick … " -> Do you think you could change trick with another noun?;

  • “Now worm, don’t make me regret collaborating with you…!” -> Who is the entity talking to? Lambert?
    -Magnus: “Cousin … you should have listened to me … Soldiers, capture the murderers or be punished!” -> I don’t feel like “or be punished” sounds natural as a threat. Also, why would Magnus threathen his own soldiers? When did he try to persuade Kryphon, for that matter? I don’t think he was on screen long enough for him to do so.

1 Like
47

Hi, I want to say that this topic isn’t dead… It’s just I have a doubt: ShouId I make a route split after chapter 1?
What do you think?

  • Yes
  • No

0 voters

2 Likes
48

Please don’t get overambitious.

1 Like
49

(do it, reach for the stars, my boy)

2 Likes
50

Ok then, The poll has closed and I’ve made a choice, When chapter 1 is released you’ll know what I’ve decided…

1 Like