see how sigma liked my comment and not you twos…
ive got the OP mandate of heaven to say this
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that’s because one needs to play Dies once and a half times for the true experience
one must simulate dev cycle and sudden heart palpitations at 1 am
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Jokes on you, I dont need mandate of heaven
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THE DIES EMBLEM THE DIES EMBLEM IS REEEEAAALL
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yeah you do. being horny doesn’t take away from the guilt i make you feel when i send you to stab a man to death with a poop knife.
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y’all killing people for free? I’m p2k
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Dies Emblem is the first !hack I finished since Embers Entwined in 2023. It was so awesome, one of the best !hacks I’ve ever played.
Of course, as a pious believer in the intended experience, I used my ch. 14 save file from over a year ago to complete it. I consider all consequences canon to the true Dies journey. And what a journey it was.
Scoring
For pre-ch14 stuff read my previous post.
My ch. 14 had a bug where the boss couldn’t escape, letting me grind. Don’t remember much else. 5/10
On the one hand, this was a massive slog I cheesed with Sniper Rifle Mercy Bulletcraft Roxas. On the other hand, this was the first chapter I got to cheese with Sniper Rifle Mercy Bulletcraft Roxas. 6/10
I sent Lesk and a bunch of nobodies to solo this one, only to find out I had to deal with two bosses at once each time. It was not fun. 3/10
A bunch of stationary bosses with zero anti-turtles and a broken extra turn gimmick meant easy grinding. Got Paragon to level 21 here!
7/10
Grinding Trybel here was a pain. I did it anyway. Also shoutouts to the last one requiring me to beg for a walkthrough. 2/10
I hate huge maps. I hate rout chapters. I hate hard turn limits. This one combined all three to create the most fun chapter in the game. Mind-boggling. 10/10
Pretty forgettable romp with all my strongest units. 5/10
Pretty forgettable romp with all my strongest units ft. Gunner training arc. 6/10
This one was hard enough that I ended up only deploying actually useful units (aka no ZeonBPM). Had to resort to using Bobby too, breaking my promise. I blame you. 0/10
Actually good gimmick boss, but I had no way of knowing future gimmicks before they showed up and loath restarting, so I ended up RNG rigging a ton instead. Wasn’t very fun. 4/10
[SIGMA FIX ENDGAME’S TURN COUNT]
I tried turn 1 Resonance+, didn’t like it, tried playing normally, didn’t like it either, and reverted to turn 1 Resonance+. Cheesed God on turn 2 without noticing thanks to the Wob Robe, and finished with an epic Roxas win.
Anyway it was actually really fun & challenging, this is what Conquest Endgame should’ve been. My one complaint is that having to escape after killing God was pretty lame & boring. 9/10
But now let’s get to important part - the user unit tier list. Which is both the first one posted here and also the only one written by a non-submitter, and is thus canon.
Tier list
All screenshots were taken during the final preps to mitigate God scrambling. As before, written in second person. Enjoy your very own personalized review.
A - ll the BEsts
Growths > Bases.
Sniper Rifle Mercy Bulletcraft Roxas. You carried so many chapters and got to slay God. The real MVP.
Astrid is my favorite character. But you were also a real carry despite probably the worst stats here, the power of Missile Range +1 Canto+ Minya.
I have no gods, only pawns. And you’re only my third favorite now. Still super good though.
Your skill is super awesome, but you had pretty horrid luck with level ups. 3x perma-brave is unsurprisingly good anyway.
Last minute mage 2. I did bother training you, sorry.
Lesk 2.
Before you murder me for being a hypocrite, which I am, you do technically have a growth!
B - etter than Most
The basically always deployed units.
Epic kit, which never ceased being both fun and useful.
Less interesting but probably better abilities. So Fucked Up God, the power of bunnies.
My only mage. Super useful everywhere. Your endgame skill was hilarious.
I initially benched you until realizing you were the perfect Paragon support bot. Also your Dual Strike saved me in ch. 21.
You mostly just used Alanzo’s Barrier Field, but your Wob Rob (which I gave you in 2024 and completely forgot about) cheesed God’s invincibility which was epic.
See above.
C - heerleaders
All of you almost never saw combat, but had good aura buffs and thus were deployed anyway.
Carried so many lategame maps. Please stop screaming.
Paragon (and friends) growth support bot.
Turnwheel is nice when I had the deploy slots.
I mean.
Before you murder me for being a hypocrite, which I am, you can technically gain stats through combat which is, like, growth adjacent! I never even tried
Emotional support to have someone whose mug I made. You got to drive tanks!
D - id Something
Contributing meaningfully in even a single chapter is a feat in Dies.
Benches once you leveled up, but contributed before that and also in Endgame - in fact, you one-rounded Rainlash thanks to the “all stats tripled” skill!
You were a ch. 15b nobody yet somehow helped a ton there. Also contributed a bit in Endgame. Petal Blizzard is super good.
Really useful against both Sigma and God.
Saved Endgame with Resonance+. Thank you for your sacrifice.
Making enemies Horny with Booba Portrait to let merciless units murder foes was useful for like, one chapter.
REDACTED was deployed only to enable Bardtrain (plus like two Endgame shenanigans). Bardtrain was uh, used a couple of times. The Dynamic Duo of Did Dsomething.
Attacked God once.
Okay this one’s funny: I kept Levin in the bottom tile during Endgame cause I had no idea one had to escape with all units after slaying God. And Levin was blocked by a line of Tuns who couldn’t one-round them. I solved it by using your Rune of Flight to let Levin bypass the Tuns and commit suicide, letting me end the map.
You lockpicked a chest in 15a (Ultrax chapter, think it’s a), got the Pocket Rocket, and had zero move for the rest of the game. No, I never used it. But gotta hoard you know?
I never had any intention of using you, but you got dragged out by Sigma and I tried using you anyway with KD Dual Strikes. It worked.
Stretching the meaning of Did here but you gave Trybel their best knife, very cool.
Used in Endgame like twice to murder angels. Aka deployed to get traumatized. You get bumped from E to D cause D stands for Dragz.
E - liminated
Contributing meaningfully in even a single chapter, even if that “contribution” is as cannon fodder, is still something.
Used in Endgame like once to murder an angel. Aka deployed to get traumatized. Your name does not start with D.
Talked to some people in 15c turn 1 then died.
Overheated Lose then died.
Suppressing Fire then died.
Died protecting Doin Thangs. Yes, I know.
The ultimate bait. Don’t remember a specific instance though.
Deployed in 15a as bait.
Lategame has so much filler and so many deployment slots I just kept you dead.
Deployed in Endgame to die in player phase. No, I don’t remember why. Yes, I did play it today.
F - ailures
I tried deploying you - even favorited you - yet you disappointed me. Never do that again.
Okay you get a pass for assimilating Parr.
I went out of my way to remove Neko Ark PFP from you, gave you a strong kit, and for what? A mediocre sword user? Not to mention that you’re unusable in Endgame.
I love your growths, but like. 2 exp per combat, and even exp brews are barely effective. Even I have limits.
You got to steal Rivian’s chicken form and it didn’t even work? Shame on you.
I’m so sorry. I tried giving you Rivian’s chicken form but it didn’t work. I tried training you in the final three chapters and just couldn’t. But I know this is my fault: you did not fail me, I failed you.
G - one and Forgotten
Uninteresting filler. You do not get a personalized message. More than last time cause I wanna finish this in one sitting.
H - ow I Hate You
Like G but I have something (negative) to say.
I never had any intention of using you, but you got dragged out by Sigma and I tried using you anyway with KD Dual Strikes. It didn’t work.
I don’t even remember why, but I deployed you to suicide attack, forgetting that you were uncounterable. You failed at dying. In Dies Emblem. You should be ashamed of yourself.
Y - ou
There is one major difference between today and back in 2024 when I started my save: I actually got to not only know, but even speak to, some of Dies’ participants - a rare case of real-life character regression and a reduction of MND. As such, I have remedied my mistakes by refusing to use any character I remember meaningfully interacting with. You all get bottom tier.
You at least had the decency to die in my save beforehand. RIP Untitled LT Project.
Thank you for your submission.
Joining after I resumed playing is cool, but did you really have to be a good unit? Or tie me in SIGURD?
See, now this is a bad unit joining at the same time as you! Also DMing me for my SHPC patch of all things?
So much effort gone to waste. If only you weren’t in basically every phone in existence.
Your demon form being a “learned skill” is straight up misleading. Your hacks are too good too.
Being unable to use EXP Brews at base is so annoying. Chapter 17 when.
I kept forgetting that MAPPY existed and even used you once. Which sucks cause MAPPY was awesome and deserved better.
You have the most accurate representation in Dies at least, especially the Endgame quote. Mountainphone deserved better.
Okay the inferno was really cool but like, force deploying yourself? Really? This is a personal attack against me. And I enjoy your phone writing too…
You suck outside of your boss fight. You’re also my rival, nemesis and archenemy.
Goodbye.
13 Likes
I find it extremely funny and amusing how in a game like dies with units that break the entire foundation of fire emblem with extremely stupidly specific kits that sometimes even do gamebreaking stuff
your best unit was me the growth unit that does not play any differently than a regular FE character
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Glad to see that I’m universally just that awful, lmao.
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I didn’t nearly respond in time when asked to provide a mug for my character so I’m excited to see what monstrosity was bestowed upon me. I WILL be using my namesake unit no matter how much they suck
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uh oh.
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is they a knower, or an unbeknownst
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Good lord, Dies Emblem actually finished. Nice.
I did a bit of datamining to see what exactly went down with my own insert, and…
Summary
I was not expecting you to take everything in my original post so literally. But I guess I should’ve expected that from a meme hack. Can’t believe my heterosexuality became my whole personality. They really do become us.
Of course, everyone gets my name wrong and it becomes a running gag when I’m involved. Always such a treat to see people make light of my (somehow) incomprehensible name.
In hindsight, I probably should’ve put a bit more effort into my self-insert to make him less one/two-note. Maybe just a few dialogue revisions, and- ah heck, you already made me say this exact thing in the hack!
Also the nod to my hack hacking a route split. I see you did your research. Enough of it, at least, to make that kind of reference.
Yeah, in general it’s fine. Making most of my interactions based off me being a straight dude is a bit off to me, (I’d have expected it to be more about my pride as a writer, personally) but I can live with it. This is a meme hack, after all. Who’s going to take it seriously?
Looking forward to properly playing this hack. Assuming I get that far because I’m too FEGBA-vanilla-brained for this kind of super advanced stuff.
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Your submission post volunteered your sexuality, unprompted, for supports in a game featuring exclusively community members. You shouldn’t be surprised you got lightly memed on for doing that lol
Play the game, it’s fun (in its own way)
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Summary
Oh, I understand why this is the case already. I just wasn’t expecting that in particular to happen, basically. If even be mentioned at all.
It would be really weird to ship two community self-inserts, though, now that I think about it. But I have seen other communities that… put a little too much focus on sexuality, and I just inserted that detail because I’m paranoid about being misrepresented. Though I guess it backfired anyways.
Edit: Actually, the fact that people are meming about my irrationality regarding how I’m interpreted by others is proof that my paranoia is nonsense here. That actually makes me feel less anxious. Good job, guys.
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congratulations, you’re straight
anyways I took off the steering wheel from the vehicle, we shouldn’t need to turn in this trip
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So when is Dies Emblem being released
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nevermind lol (haters will say I fall off)
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I’ve added a map tiermaker template to the main post. You’ll notice that it does not contain any actual map images. I trust you guys can figure out how it works nonetheless.
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The maps representations are easy and intuitive to understand, but the tier names are insane, that’s about as expected of dies I think
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