For awhile now I’ve been working on making a rom hack of my own, and then snapped to the reality that what I was wanting to make was super ambitious (Mercenary Moon, I mean.) I found out the best way to start rom hacking was by making smaller easier hacks and projects, just like normal programming. My sights are set on three main sets: Making a minihack that I’ll share after this little speech, making a slightly larger hack than that as another practice project that will be more serious than the minihack, and then I’ll make Mercenary Moon. I doubt I’ll be able to do this on my own, so any other newbies or anyone really that wants to join me, my discord’ll be in the description. I’ll prolly make a server to dedicated for my team if I do get one.
Next, the minihack I want to make. While I do want to make a game with a somewhat serious dedication, I want to actually have fun with it. I’ll just give you the game description instead of beating around the bush and boring you with context details. I present to you:
Fire Emblem: Brainrot and Bullshit - The worst hack you’ve played
Nobody likes paying taxes, especially when most of them go to some random country in the middle of Africa that has way more power than it has any right to have. Well, our friend here, John Fire Emblem (Hey, I know that guy!) is one of the people that thought he could get away with just not paying them. Problem is: you don’t really get away with that when you rule an entire army of chuds. The IRS comes to his doors and invades his kingdom, and is given no choice but to build a wall between him and the world to protect his land. But he has a solution: destroy the problem at it’s roots. He’s gonna take out the Orange Guy and Big Yahu. But how is he gonna do it by himself, when all of his chud soldiers are defending the kingdom? John knows a guy, Reeve (is it really fair to know the literal dude who made the hack you’re in) and he agrees to pay his dues and help gather a team of elites to fight against the IRS. Along the way, you’re gonna recruit:
Amelia (literally my daughter)
Ross (Stupid ass)
Ewan (Lil’ Bro)
Triple T (Three tungs before his name, never more, never less)
Charlie Kirk (Which way are you moving?)
Miku (Miku Dayooo)
Teto (Fatass Birdbrain)
Neru (CRUCIFY THIS ONE)
MoistKritical (He’s kinda on the fence about it)
Joe Bartalozzi (WHAT THE FUCK IS THAAAAT)
Kanye West (He’s a genius)
Reeve (Stop treating me like an octopus)
Jaydien (He got medication for his acne finally)
Kenny (Whiteboy of the year - 2026)
Jack Sparrow (You’ll never guess what he has)
And more to come
This joke hack will also be somewhat a roguelite! John brings along his shopkeeper Morshu, his smith Bilac, and for some reason his twin brother John Balatro decides to tag along too, and makes everything more complicated - he’s the secret shop owner, and his stock is always changing! In between chapters, John sets up camp for his army, and you build supports, do your shopping, gear up, and fight at the arena there! The shop, armory, inn, and secret shop (that isnt really secret) have different items to buy between each chapter, making no two runs the same! At the Inn, you can meet new characters to recruit, but you’ll never know who you can recruit unti you meet them. Miss them, and they’re gone. And at the secret shop, John balatro sells his famous joker cards from his own game, giving your characters holdable items that give buffs and tradeoffs based on how much money you have.
This hack is supposed to be stupid and it’s gonna be cringey, but I sincerely hope it’s something you all enjoy when I finish it. I want to have it done by the end of january, but who knows. The humor might be a bit offensive, so please take note of that, and that everything in the hack will be just a joke and never serious.