Played this, have a lot of things to say
Minor Stuff (Not Gameplay Related)
- Please get the patch that turns gamespeed and textspeed up to fast automatically
- There are a LOT of grammar errors, capitalizations, run on sentences, etc. I thought of getting screenshots of all of them but there are just too many. I would recommend looking over the script again or having someone else help you out with that.
- This actually persists into gameplay somewhat, with stuff like the ch1 skeleton enemies being called “skeleton” instead of the properly capitalized “Skeleton” and their description not being properly capitalized as well. The named characters don’t seem to have this issue, though, besides their class descriptions also not being capitalized.
- In addition to character descriptions, some weapons don’t seem to have proper descriptions, grammatically speaking. An example would be the Mage Killer axe description not having a period. Mini Bow description isn’t capitalized, I could go on.
- In Ch2, if you look at the water in the bottom left corner, it doesn’t animate properly. The tile animations make it look like the lake is at war with itself with currents going every which way. I’d recommend replacing those tiles with ocean tiles
Chapters
Prologue thing:
Why? I don’t get it. You have a single unit and then take out 2 trainees and a cav, and then get gold. Nothing of story importance happens. This isn’t a good tutorial either because you don’t tell the player anything explicitly, if that was the intention. Could easily be cut to better serve the pacing of the game.
Ch1:
Why can’t solum talk to the two recruits???
Why does sagitta straight up ORKO Mick when he is the one meant to recruit her, I really don’t know what was intended here. I can use Fidem but she has such a huge range that it’s so easy to even accidentally put the cav in range of this instakill trap basically.
Why is Fidem in a field of lance users so that when he’s recruited he will be facing WTD immediately? There’s maybe 2 mercs on the entire map and no fighters, pretty bad first impression for a unit.
Why do I just start with 2 units on an unnecessarily large map with little enemy variety and 0 terrain tiles? Seems like a pretty uninteresting map gameplaywise.
Not sure what the point of the guy saying they’re gonna summon more skeletons is, I assume it’s meant to be telegraphing but they say them on the same turn the reinforcements spawn.
Install the hack that lets you see if an enemy doesn’t move. If you don’t know where to get it, here you go. It can be a bit tough to find. Zeroing/nullifying mov FEDS style (based on AI parameters?) - #43 by Venno.
Why does the boss tome have poison? It’s still pretty pitiful damage so just kinda wastes time.
Why doesn’t Tobias have the boss flag? This is also a problem in later chapters.
Ch2:
Kinda weird that the wyvern lord has same con as the base cav, but I get it for mounted aid purposes. Still, I think 12 mounted aid is quite a good amount, or you could just lower the cav’s con, seems a bit high to me.
What’s the sniper here for? They don’t even kill the WL or bring him near death.
On that note, all of these enemies are ridiculously chumpy, like even more than vanilla FE8 enemies. I’d recommend buffing some of their stats.
Why is there dark magic in the armory? For that matter, why’s there a vendor with anything but a vulnerary? I don’t have any magic users.
Why does a ch1 merc have a killing edge? The only one who can take him on is the ridiculously buff WL jagen who flies over the whole map and dominates so extremely already.
Ridersbane seems kind of low uses to me but I get this is a shorter hack so makes sense.
What’s the point of the seize objective? Every enemy charges you already and there’s no advantage to seizing since there’s no antiturtle. The seize point is also kind of unclear because a ruined village doesn’t really convey seize point on its own, I’d recommend marking it with a thief escape tile marker.
End of this chapter has a bunch of awkward expositional dialogue that feels kind of forced. Would look into rewriting this so it flows better.
Ch3:
Talking to Cory should recruit Sal at the same time.
There’s not much interesting in the way of how this chapter is designed. It’s an open field of axe users with some forests so you can enemy phase them with your sword user myrm and wyvern lord. My other units didn’t really get any use and I was able to easily clean up the map for all the exp due to no anti turtle incentive.
Not sure if this is a bug or what, but noticed that swordsmen don’t take terrain penalties from forests. Forests on this map are classified as “Villages” for whatever reason, so might want to fix that.
Why do I get a hammer here? The armor knights have 4 mov and are ORKOd by my 12 def mage (cool concept btw, big fan of tank mages).
What was up with the reinforcements? Just more grinding fodder? They didn’t seem like there was any point to them showing up when they did.
The boss here incentivizes just using the jagen since he’s the unit who doesn’t take any damage and thus can’t be annoyed by nosferatu on the boss.
Ch4:
Didn’t play this one, but I looked the map and it looked pretty empty again, I’d recommend adding a few forests.
Enemies from the stats also looked pretty easy as the rest.
Sorry if I came off as harsh, my intention was not to simply bash on your hack. I don’t think these issues would be too difficult to solve, actually. A lot of it is just polish or slightly buffing enemies or stuff like that, and I definitely think there are some interesting concepts here. I wish you the best and hopefully find my feedback useful 
. Seems like lately you’ve been needing some more testing so hopefully I was able to push you in the right direction, at least. If you have any more questions please let me know.